Carmen Sandiego

REUTERS:
"Proving boomerangs really do come back, an Australian town was on Thursday celebrating the return of a boomerang stolen from an outback museum by an American tourist.." (click here to read the entire story).

Now, I know that the article claims that the boomerang was stolen and returned by a Vermont man named Peter, but I smell a cover up, and I have video proof that the culprit is none other than this bitch:

I got your number B. More like steal it yourself.

Working with a Stiff One

So we all know Lindsay Lohan knows her way around a stiffy- but this brings it to a whole new level.


The Associated Press is reporting that as part of her punishment for driving drunk (in addition to 84 minutes of jail time), Lindsay will work 8 hours at a morgue. Read below:

"Fri Jan 18, 8:25 AM ET

"LOS ANGELES - Lindsay Lohan is about to see dead people.

The 21-year-old actress will soon be working at a morgue as part of her punishment for misdemeanor drunken driving, her attorney, Blair Berk, told a judge Thursday.

She has also spent two months in rehabilitation and has done some community service, Berk said at a hearing on her progress toward fulfilling the terms of her plea bargain.

Her two four-hour days at the morgue are part of a court-ordered program to show drivers the real-life consequences of drinking and driving. She must also spend two days working in a hospital emergency room.

Lohan was arrested twice last year on DUI charges and pleaded guilty in August to misdemeanor drunken driving and cocaine charges. She has already served 84 minutes in jail as part of the plea deal."

This seems like a good idea on paper, but I question how effective it is for someone who has been convicted of numerous DUI's. EVERYONE knows how dangerous driving drunk is- and in my opinion people who drive drunk just don't give a shit. I don't know that seeing a dead body is going to make any difference.

I think that instead of looking at dead people they should be forced to serve more than 84 minutes in jail- and not in isolation. I have a feeling that after you wake up to your butch cellmate forcing you to eat her coochie while threatening you with a knife made from toothbrush, you will think twice about driving drunk again.

Free At Last

Well, almost.



Kiefer Sutherland is rumored to be released from prison after the coming weekend.

You know this bitch was taking it in prison left and right- "Yeah, Take That Jack Bauer"- but that's okay Kiefer, you can come to me, I'll protect you. And by protect I mean molest- you can bring Chloe along to watch.