Girl Next Door

So for those of you who have been following the Winehouse story-line on the Young and the Crackhead , when we last left off with our beloved heroine, her addiction to crack had been made public to the world when The Sun published this video of the Winehouse smoking crack and rambling something or another about a lost cat of hers. Amy has then since dyed her hair back to black and adorned the hive before checking into rehab 10 days ago, coping with her withdrawal symptoms through the pleasures of Marilyn Monroe movies (and I'm sure a fuckload of meds).

And so with all that having gone down within the past, oh, I don't know, two weeks, I was surprised to see Amy already out and about, and looking pretty good for the Wino.

What I'm most shocked about are those boobs? Have those always been there? Are they a side effect of detox? Are they just realizing, now that they're sober, that they fail in comparison to her giant bee-hive and are therefore over-compensating by growing over-night? All possibilities. But I suspect that, much like the bee-hive, Amy is using her ample bosom to hide all things secret and lost. Say perhaps this....

The little cat that Amy claimed her friends took from her house the night she was taped smoking crack.

Or perhaps it's her secret stash of crisps, chocolate, and crack...


But perhaps, since Amy is visiting the US Embassy she has something (or should I say someone) else hiding in her cleavage:

It's Blake, just in case she got her Visa on the spot, Amy was ready to make a run for it. Smuggled convict husband in her boobs. Drugs, cash, and a secret jet pack in the hive.

Diamonds Are a Crackheads Best Friend

Got a little drug problem? Suffering from wicked withdrawal? Wanna clean it up but don't have time for stinky rehab? Well get yourself a BlockBuster Card and start watching some Marilyn Monroe. That's what the Wino's doing:

"Her dad Mitch told The Sun yesterday: 'Amy is very ill and is suffering horrific withdrawal symptoms - shivering and constantly throwing up. Her body is expelling all the rubbish. One thing helping Amy is her Marilyn Monroe films. Amy loves Some Like It Hot. She’s a huge fan of Monroe and thinks she’s wonderful.'
Amy, 24 - who famously sang ‘No, no, no!’ to treatment in her hit Rehab - was admitted to London’s Capio Nightingale Hospital last Thursday after The Sun published shocking video stills of her smoking crack cocaine." (click here to read the whole article)

Somebody quick, call Dr. Drew of Celebrity Rehab. If Marilyn Monroe movies can help super-junkie, Amy Winehouse, with her withdrawal symptoms, think of what it can do to your run of the mill addicts!!!! Someone should study the healing properties of Marilyn Monroe movies.

Here's hoping that all that Marilyn watching won't send her back to this look:

Video Killed the Radio Star

So below is the video that The Sun has acquired of Amy Winehouse smoking some crack. Just a normal day in the Winehouse house.

Now, I still can't believe that this bitch got a Visa to come to America for the Grammy's, but this is exactly the kind of show I'm hoping Amy will bring on the road, camera crew and all.